Act 2, Scene 4: This Shit is Bananas


"As we stepped out of the cloud of black mist that seperates the two worlds from each other, the familiar rugged landscape of the shadow world appeared before us. Immediately, a flood of old memories came back to me … memories that I had always been trying to hold back: My first days in the dream world, when I was still unaware that I was dreaming. The day Tarrion's hunters caught me, finding out that I wouldn't wake up, no matter how much they tortured me.

They took me to their capitol, trying to find out how often a week they could feed on me while still keeping me alive. Barely alive. Eventually, the exhaustion and the pain made me descend into madness, which was both a curse and a blessing. I was no longer a person to them, and one day, they let their attention slip. I made it back to the dream world somehow, returning to my own dream that would neither change nor fade away as long as I was alive. All this had happened almost two decades ago.

Surprisingly, when I returned to the shadow world with Mika, Lionel and Lori, I did not feel any fear. I looked around, and the landscape looked a lot less terrifying than I remembered it. I even found that it had a dark beauty to it as it lay before me in deep tones of black and red. You start seeing things differently once you have come to peace with yourself. Finally, I had set out to challenge Lord Tarrion instead of running away from him. And knowing that someone needed my help HERE and NOW gave me the necessary strength. The new purpose of my life become clearer and clearer, like an unsharp picture that slowly comes back into focus.

I knew that what happened to me must never happen again to another dreamer. It was my duty … no, my destiny to prevent this! I had to help my friends to wake up. And even if it was their fate to spend the rest of their lives in this world, I would make sure that they could live in freedom!

We would rescue the ferret, and give these creatures back a taste of what THEY had done to ME. I always wanted to find out if vampires can bleed."


%AMB% 09 - Shadowlands

%ACT% Finlay, Mika, Lionel and Lori enter from Section B

%ACT% Lori whimpers

%SND% 0801 - Suspense Music Pt.1

%SND% 0801 (cont.) - Lori: "Oh, how I hate this place! The dream world was already pretty scary, but this is even worse!"

Finlay: "Now you see why I never wanted to return to the shadow world. It's evil!"

Mika: "I don't know. I've been in scarier places before. What worries me more is that we have no idea where to go."

%SND% 0802 - Lori: "To the capitol, of course."

Mika: "Oh yeah, and which direction would that be, Miss Know-it-all?"

Finlay: "Shhhhhhh! Vampires approaching! Everyone take cover!"

%SND% 0801 (STOP)
%SND% 0803 - Bushes Appearing 1

%ACT% Everyone huddles together, ducking below the playrail

%ACT% Four bushes appear next to each other in place of the puppets

%ACT% Two minions fly across the scene from B to A

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Minion1: "Darling?"

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Minion2: "Yes, my dear?"

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Minion1: "Did I mention that you look absolutely gorgeous tonight? Especially your skin! It's so beautifully pale!"

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Minion2: "Oh, I'm so glad you noticed! I spent the whole night at the beach, moonbathing!"

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Minion1: "Wonderful! Absolutely wonderful …"

%ACT% Minions leave the stage

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Lori: "Are they gone yet?"

%SND% 0803 (cont.) - Suspense Music Pt. 2

Finlay: "Yes! All Clear!"

%SND% 0804 - Bushes Disappearing 1

%ACT% Bushes disappear, Puppets re-appear

%SND% 0804 (cont.) - Lori: "Oh, I hate it when this happens! I'm sick and tired of sneaking around and hiding all the time!"

Mika: "It's not like we have a choice. Watching the vampires fly is our only chance to figure out where their headquarters are!"

Finlay: "Alarm! More vampires approaching! Duck and cover!"

%ACT% everyone sighs

%ACT% They duck, Lori and Mika to the left, Lionel and Finlay to the right

%ACT% Two bushes appear left, two right

%SND% 0803 (STOP)
%SND% 0805 - Bushes Appearing

%ACT% Two Minions come flying through the scene from A to B

%SND% 0805 (cont.) Minion1: "By the way, I'm seriously thinking of joining Tarrion's new hunting party. How about you? I think his new plans look very promising!"

%SND% 0805 (cont.) Minion2: "I don't think I'd enjoy working under his direct order. They say he's a quite an asshole to work for …"

%SND% 0805 (cont.) Minon1: "Well, what do you expect? He's in middle management! But let's assume it all works out, and he wins … wouldn't that look great on your CV?"

%SND% 0805 (cont.) Minion2: "I don't know if that would be worth it …"

%SND% 0805 (cont.) - Suspense Music Pt. 3

%ACT% Minions leave the stage

Finlay: "All right! The coast is clear again!"

%ACT% Bushes disappear, Puppets re-appear

%SND% 0806 - Bushes Disappearing 2

%SND% 0806 (cont.) - Lori: "Grrrr! Will this EVER end? Studying how the bats fly may sound like a great plan in theory, but how much longer will it take? Days? Weeks? We don't have so much time!"

Mika: "If you have a better idea, I'm all ears!"

%SND% 0807 - Lori: "Can't we just ask for the way?"

%ACT% Everone groans

%SND% 0808 - Lori: "What?"

Finlay: "Alarm! Enemy approaching on the ground! Everone hide!"

%SND% 0805 (STOP)
%SND% 0809 - Lori: "Oh no, not again!"

%ACT% Everyone turns into bushes again

%SND% 0809 (cont.) - Bushes Appearing

%ACT% Sky appears in Section A, limping exhaustedly

%ACT% Sky is totally out of breath

Sky (to herself): "Oh shit. What have I gotten myself into? Searching the entire area on foot is taking forever. I wish I could just fly like everyone else. I really need a break. These feet just aren't built for long distance walking. *sigh*"

%ACT% Sky sits down on the rock, taking a rest.

%ACT% Finlaybush moves over to Mikabush

Finlaybush: "Ssssht! Mika!"

Mikabush (whispering): "Yes, Finlay? What is it?"

Finlaybush (whispering): "Could I borrow your frying pan for a moment?"

Mikabush (wispering): "No?"

Finlaybush (whispering): "Oh come on! Trust me, I know what I'm doing!"

Mikabush (whispering): "Okay, if you say so. Here you are. Now what's your plan?"

Finlaybush (whispering): "We're going to ask for the way!"

Mikabush (whispering): "What? You gotta be kidding!"

Finlaybush (whipering): "No, I'm not. You distract the vampire, and I'll do the rest! Let's go!"

%ACT% Finlaybush disappears

Mikabush (whispering): "Finlay? Finlay! Oh, rats!"

%ACT% Mikabush moves over to the other bushes

Mikabush (whispering): "Lori, Lionel? I need your help! Whatever happens, just play along, okay?"

%SND% 0810 - Lori: "Okay!"

Lionel: "Okay!"

Mikabush (loud): "Hey you!"

%ACT% The three remaining bushes dance a short choreography to a 10 second sample of Gwen Stafani's "Hollaback Girl", posing with bananas.

%SND% 0811 - "This shit is bananas! B-AN-AN-AS!"
%SND% 0811 (cont.) - "This shit is bananas! B-AN-AN-AS!"
%SND% 0811 (cont.) - "This shit is bananas! B-AN-AN-AS!"
%SND% 0811 (cont.) - "This shit is bananas! B-AN-AN-AS!"

%ACT% Auf ende von Applaus warten :)

Sky: "What the fuck?"

%ACT% Finlay emerges with Mika's Pan behind Sky, and hits her over the head.

%SND% 0812 - BANG!

Sky: "Aaaaah!"

%ACT% Sky doubles over

%SND% 0813 - Attack Music

Finlay: "Now! Everybody get on her wings! Hold her down!"

%ACT% The bushes disappear, normal puppets again.

All: "Aaaaaaaaah!"

%ACT% Everyone jumps on Sky. Lori and Lionel pin down one wing, Mika and Finlay the other.

%ACT% Sky moans in pain

Finlay: "All right Vampire! You are now our prisoner! Resistance is futile!"

Sky (coughing and whimpering): "Help! Please help me!"

Finlay: "Oh, and you'd better stop calling for help, because this frying pan has a +2 bonus against vampires, and I'm really good with dice you know?"

Sky: "No … I … I … mean .. you must help me! Poke … he … is …"

%SND% 0813 (STOP)
%SND% 0814 - Rage Music

Mika: "Poke? How do you know his name? Oh wait! Now I recognize you! I've seen you before! You're one of those bastards who took Poke away! FINLAY! Give me that!"

%ACT% Mika grabs the pan and goes into a frenzy of rage

Mika: "I'll show you what Mika does to people who hurt her friends! Take this you bitch! And this! And this! And …"

%ACT% Mika goes postal, hitting the helpless Sky over and over again, who lays there, bleeding

%SND% 0812 - BONG!
%SND% 0812 - BONG!
%SND% 0812 - BONG!

%ACT% Finlay rushes forward, stopping Mika

Finlay: "MIKA , stop! STOP! Calm down! It's enough! It's enough!"

%SND% 0814 (cont.) - Calm Music

Sky: "Please, let me talk … let me talk! And please, get off my wings! I'm not able to fly away, one way or another."

Finlay (sanely): "All right then. Let's talk. You don't look like you're in the shape to make an escape anyways, so I might as well let you stand up."

%ACT% everybody steps away from Sky.

%ACT% Sky gathers up her wings, coughing like she's going to die.

%ACT% She puts her wings around her, shaking

Mika (angry): "Now what is it? Speak! What did you do to Poke? And how can we find him? Tell us now, or else!"

%ACT% Mika wields her Frying Pan threateningly

%ACT% Sky looks at Mika without flinching and sniffs back her snot

Sky: "Please! No more violence. Beating me up was totally unnecessary. I was going to tell you everything anyways. In fact that's the main reason why I came here at all. I’ve been searching for you. I was just about to give up hope! But then suddenly YOU found ME. Isn’t that ironic?"

Mika (getting close to Sky): "What … did … you … do … to … Poke?"

Sky: "Poke is a prisoner in Lord Tarrion's custody. I was forced to drink his blood, but it was against my own free will. I could never willingly hurt him. I love him!"

Mika: "You're lying! You're a vampire! For you he's just another worthless dreamer! And I've known Poke for many years! Nobody loves Poke!"

Sky (sarcastic): "If that were true, then why are YOU here?"

%ACT% Mika stares at Sky in surprise

Mika (mouth open): "I … I … I …"

Sky (angry): "And what do you REALLY know about Poke? Do you know who his parents are, and why he never talks about them? Do you know what he REALLY does at university all day? And do YOU know how miserable it feels to be the family reject? I do!"

Mika (mouth open): "How … how can you possibly know about all this?"

%SND% 0815 - Lori: "They must have tortured Poke until he told them his most intimate secrets! Those evil bastards!"

Sky: "No! Please, believe me. Poke told me all these things because I was the first person in years to truly care for him! Sometimes things are not what they seem. Here, I'll prove it to you. Take this map. It will show you where we are, and where Poke is being held prisoner. I prepared this just for you."

%ACT% Sky hands Mika the map

Mika (sceptical): "Aha. Let's see … interesting. But how do we know this is not a trap?"

Sky: "You don't. But I want Poke to be alive as much as you do."

%SND% 0814 (STOP)
%SND% 0816 - Action Music

Finlay: "Oh shit! Air Raid Alarm! More Vampires coming in! Everyone duck and cover!"

Mika: "Aaaaaaaaah!"

%SND% 0816 (STOP)
%SND% 0817 - Lori: "Aaaaaaaaah!" + Suspense Music

%ACT% everyone cries in panic, runs in circles and hides under their bushes.

%ACT% Finlay doesn't find his bush, panicking!

Finlay: "Oh no! Where is my cover? Where is that goddamn shrubbery? Shit! Now they're going to get me! Oh my god! Somebody do something! I don't want to die! Aaaaah!"

%ACT% Sky shuts up Finlay with a wing.

Finlay: "Mmmppmmpmrpmpf!"

Sky (whispering): "Ssssh! Quiet! I can make sure nothing will happen to you … but you'll have to shut up and sit still for a minute. Do you think you can cope with that?"

%ACT% Finlay whimpers and nods.

%ACT% Sky pulls him under her wings. Then she spreads her wings, covering up Finlay.

%ACT% Two minions come flying from A to B

%SND% 0818 - Minion1: "Oh, look, down there! Isn't that Tarrion's little doll?"

%SND% 0818 (cont.) - Minion2: "Yes, I think you're right! Hey, sweetheart, does your Papa know you're out late?"

%SND% 0818 (cont.) - Minions laugh

Sky (virtual fake smile): "Eh … hi guys! Yeah, of course he knows! I never go out without his permission!"

%SND% 0819 - Minion1 (laughing): "What the hell are you doing there anyways?"

Sky: "Oh, I'm just … practicing. Flight practice. You see?"

%ACT% Sky waves her wings a little bit

%SND% 0820 - Minion2: "Oh, how cute! And when you're done, Papa is going to feed his little babygirl from a bottle, because she's still too young to bite and chew on her own!"

%SND% 0820 (cont.) - Minions laugh

Sky (contritely): "Yeah, he's such a loving father, isn't he?"

%SND% 0821 - Minion1: "Come on, let's move on … before she expects us to change her diapers!"

%SND% 0821 - Minions laugh

%SND% 0821 - Minions fly away

%SND% 0817 (STOP)

%ACT% Minions fly off

Sky (to herself): "One day, I will get back to you assholes. One day."

%ACT% Everyone re-appears as non-bushes

%SND% 0822 - Bushes Disappear 4

Finlay: "I don't believe it. A vampire just saved my life. Why did you do that?"

Sky: "I already told you we're on the same side!"

Finlay: "I don't know how I could ever repay you for that."

Sky: "I came here to seek your help, so you can help me, if you want. But only if you believe in the greater good, I don't want you to repay me. I've got my own father and his entire tribe against me. Alone, I'm helpless. And there's so much more at stake than the life of a ferret!"

Finlay: "How so?"

Sky: "Tarrion has found a way to bind dreamers in the dream world, and he wants to enslave thousands of them. He must be stopped, but there is no way I can do this alone."

Finlay: "You protected my life, despite being ridiculed and humiliated by your own kind. That is enough for me to give you the benefit of the doubt and believe you. I'm going to stand up for you just like you stood up for me."

%SND% 0823 - Lori: "Yes, and we're all going to come with you!"

Sky: "No! Look, I'm really grateful that you all changed your mind about me so quickly, but … no. You've gone through enough trouble. This is my business. You should go and free Poke. The map will tell you where to find him."

Mika: "Wouldn't it be more sensible to go and rescue Poke first, and then face Lord Tarrion and his Minions as one big group?"

Sky: "Yes, but we're running out of time! Right now while we're talking, my father is building an army. Currently there are only a few guards at the source of black ice. Very soon however, the place will be swarming with Tarrion's hunters. So we need to strike quickly. It's now or never."

Mika: "Okay, I understand. I'll cross my claws for you then. And … I'm terribly sorry for attacking you like that."

Sky: "I'm the one who needs to be sorry. The only reason why you're part of this mess is my own shortsightedness, after all. I promise I will make up for it and do whatever I can to help you wake up again. Meet me tomorrow night at the northern cliff. It's on the map I gave you. If I'm still alive by then, I will be there."

Mika: "And we will be there, waiting for you."

Sky: "All right then! Come on Finlay, there are a lot of things I need to explain to you. Good luck everyone!"

Mika: "Wait! Just one more question!"

Sky: "Yes?"

Mika: "What's your name?"

Sky: "My name is Sky."

%SND% 0824 - Finale Music

Mika: "Thank you, Sky. And good luck!"

%LIG% Lights out

%HND% Close Curtain